Sorry it's been a while since I posted! It's been a hectic month or so, time is flying by. Actually I've been pretty lazy so that hasn't helped either.
We've had a few busy weekends, the busiest day by far was when we went to a special session at Silcocks funfair in Wigan, courtesy of Blessings in Disguise, a charity local to us which arranges events for disadvantaged children and their families. For that morning, only disabled children were present along with their families. The great thing about an event like this is that everyone is equal.
It doesn't matter what the disability is, we are all in the same boat, there is no worrying about how your kids behave in public, how much screaming they do, whether they're struggling to wait in a queue etc, cos we are all the same. This kinda stuff is really important for us, as "Family time" or trips out are really difficult. Its hard to keep everyone happy, and quite often William dictates what we get up to, depending on whether or not he can handle what we have planned, or how long it takes before he gets bored and starts buggering off. Alex misses out on a lot, so this was a great opportunity to let him have some fun too, in a safe environment. Thankfully, I managed to avoid having to go on the freaky shit rides, that was his Dads job :D
Unfortunately I didn't manage to avoid the rollercoaster. Admittedly, the rollercoaster looked pretty tame, and there didn't seem to be very many ill-looking faces as they exited the ride. Bonus, I thought. How wrong I was, and how delightfully amused William was as I screeched my way over the tiddly bumps like a big girlie. The shame.
The sight of children dropping to the floor, melting down was the norm, and no one batted an eyelid. It was a truly magical morning.
Fast forward on the same day. What a difference a couple of hours makes. In Tesco, the sight of William throwing himself on the ground in the middle of the aisles was not so widely accepted. Granted, shopping is a bit crap, and William was pretty miffed that he wasn't allowed to mess with the playhouse on display in the kids section. The sight of me dragging him out of that playhouse was not a pretty one, but I didn't fancy forking out for a broken house as he continued to kick the crap out of it while I politely tried to coax him out. People walked past with disapproving looks, not even a sympathetic smile. We left quickly after that, after just picking up a fraction of our shopping. He has a knack for being a pain in the arse in public.
Lesson learned - Click and Collect.
The thing is, I've not yet grown that tough skin that says "f*ck you and your opinions about my child". He's not spoilt, and he's not a brat. I take that back, he's not a brat ALL of the time. He's just a kid. And I would challenge anyone who has ever given me disapproving looks about his behaviour to come and have a go and see how you deal with it. And watch me chuckle as you fail miserably.
We are currently under guidance of the Behaviour Support Team. I guess I hoped they had some kind of magic wand and fabulous advice and suddenly everything would become easy to deal with. I was told that we were doing everything right when it comes to his behaviour: ignore the unwanted behaviour if it was safe to do so. Yes that does mean leaving him sprawled on the floor in Tesco, and if he's in the way of people, dump him in a quiet area before leaving him sprawled.
So that magic wand fizzled out in a "Poof of arseness" and we carry on as before. We do have some good ideas regarding his temper though, so fingers crossed that those will work over time.
<My apologies in advance to whichever stores we visit in future, if you do see me on CCTV dragging a small body across the floor to a secret place, I assure you its just William and he's truly alive. >
In contrast to the evil eyes of Tesco, we visited White Moss Garden Centre one weekend. William had a fascination with the counters, you know the ones with the little doors. The lady at the till was so lovely and not a hint of annoyance. That's the kind of acceptance we need so badly in society. I suppose it would be easy for me to just tell everyone we meet that he has autism and it might make people more understanding, but why should I have to? It doesn't define him. If everyone got their heads out of their arse and had a bit more patience then the world would be a better place.
Finally, if you have time would you check out Ben on facebook An Autistic Author . He writes a blog on the other side of autism and he's a bloody fab chap. And I'm proud to do a weekly blogspot on there for him, so if you're missing my posts on here then check out Ben's blog cos I might have done something there :D
"Get off the frigging floor Wottingers!"
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