Its almost been a whole year since William started at New Greenhall school. I remember the first days, worrying about what was ahead, would he settle with new people? Would he fit in? How would he cope with taking the bus to school? "He's too young to get on a school bus all by himself!" I remember bleating to Daddy.
We have received William's school report for the end of his first year, and as usual I prepare myself for the "report blub" which inevitably happens whenever I read things about his progress or needs, as its often daunting or upsetting. It was a great read though, detailing how much he loves school and the fantastic progress he's made this year. He is making three word sentences using PECs (cheeky git won't do that at home). Please and thankyou without prompts (cheeky git won't do that at home). Follows simple instructions straight away (cheeky git wont.... hang on there's a pattern here!).
He's very comfortable with physical things, as evidenced by the terrifying pictures sent in his schoolbag of him up a climbing wall, requiring me to down several sherries to steady my nerves after viewing.
Many things that he does in a school environment he will not do at home. We find it difficult to engage him a lot of the time, we certainly can't get him to have his face painted or wear a red nose for comic relief day. I can't even get him in his bloody school uniform, yet school have him dressed up like a star for the Christmas play, complete with tinsel halo. He did look like a slightly embarrassed (possibly traumatised) star but a very cute traumatised star at that.
At parents evening today the staff commented on how well he had matured and grown in confidence since he started. We learned that when he comes into school he will say the names of the other children as they follow him in. I've never heard William say the name of any other children at home, its as if what happens at school, stays in school, like its 2 completely separate entities for him. Which is a shame, because I love to listen to what the kids get up to. Its taken Alex to get to Year 2 for him to actually tell me what he does, up to that point it was "don't know" or "can't remember". I'd love to hear what William is involved in too.
I find it a bit sad sometimes, as school obviously get to see a side to William that I have yet to see. He loves to choose stories, he's never really done that with me and gets cross if I try and read to him. He loves to sing, again that's rare with me. I feel like I'm missing out. Apparently he enjoys anticipating what is going to happen next in a story, which the TA says is something that would usually happen at an older age which is pretty cool. Maybe he's got a great imagination. Maybe he'll one day write books about the Pontipines really being aliens and abducting Iggle Piggle, leaving secret codes in Upsy Daisys bed, which can only be revealed using Makka Pakkas sponge. Ok maybe I'm getting too excited. You never know. Maybe he'll be a rugby player, he's not soft enough for a footballer. Perhaps a shotputter, he flings the ipad hard enough.
William responds well to prompts at school, and music is often used to indicate the time of day at school, for example a song from Peter Pan is used to indicate that it's tidy up time, and he always cooperates. <Frantically searching for the bloody song on YouTube in the hope of a tidy house> I think I need a specific bedtime song because he's still swinging off the lampshade full of beans and its nearly 9pm. I may have to incorporate these techniques at home over the summer, then perhaps my blood pressure may go down. I may even.... get some sleep......
One of the most important parts of his report was the following phrase :
"He interacts in a small group of friends and actively seeks their company". Still gets me all tearry eyed now and I've had the report for a week. In the beginning when I was starting to process this whole autism thing, I found it really difficult to think that William might never really have a friendship or someone to love. I mean, to him, it might never have been important anyway. But to think of him being a loner (by choice or otherwise) was something I found deeply troubling. Seeing the early stages of forming relationships and friendships is really amazing, and encouraging that perhaps he will truly be happy in the long term.
I am eternally grateful to those people who have been involved with our family in this pivotal year. From the charities that have supported us in whatever way - Breaking Barriers North West, Love Autism in the North West, Blessings in Disguise, Embrace.
All the staff at Williams school, who have made such a difference in our little mans life and ours.
All our friends who have stuck by us and have been so understanding of my cancelled playdates when I've struggled. I know I don't see you all often enough but we're starting to really get somewhere now and I shall be pestering you all soon.
All the NEW friends! Without our exchange of stories of food theft, streaking, nappy accidents and teaching our children (accidentally) to swear, this journey would be so difficult.
All the family, who always try their hardest to include William even when its difficult, and treat him like any other pain in the arse 4.5 year old.
To Simon (Daddy) who gets me through the bad times with reasoning, hugs, coffee and peanut butter ice cream.
To Alex, the best big dude ever, who despite being under the cloud today for crossing a room by standing on furniture, is probably the biggest bundle of fun ever (squeezed in a tiny body with an enormous gob).
To William - the best little dude ever, who has taught me a lot about sominex, coffee tolerance and how amazing it is to be a little bit different.
To my dog Nibbler, who copes with being squished, chucked off the couch and trodden on, my best furry friend.
Love you all.
In a minute Wottingers!!
Tuesday 7 July 2015
Wednesday 1 July 2015
Sports Day and Special People
Two years on from Williams diagnosis, and although I'm more at peace with what's going on, I'm not sure I'll ever 'get over it'. There's always gonna be the reminders of what he could have been like when you meet other children his age. Its my problem totally, I just feel a bit sorry for myself every now and again. I'm starting to think that perhaps I'm holding William back a little bit because of my own fears - about what people think of him and us, about people's reaction to his behaviour, the fact that we can't go near public loos, that he can't wait in a queue, that he's still in nappies when he's nearly 5. So, we're gonna start branching out and being a bit more brave. (I might retract that next weekend when he has a paddy in ASDA and starts starfishing on the floor in the biscuit aisle). "Starfish on aisle 4, starfish on aisle 4!"
Now I've never made his autism secret, but as he gets older and starts to stand out a bit more from his peers, I find that letting people know about it can be a help, and not everyone is there to judge. I've not had many negative response so far (runs to touch wood), but I guess one day I'll meet that arsehole and they'll get ten barrels from that sleep deprived woman on the edge.
Yesterday was William's sports day at New Greenhall school. Now I'm not a fan of Sports Day one iota, I was never physically gifted when I was younger, I was crap at PE and crap at Sports Days, and even now I have the co-ordination of a 3-legged centipede. Williams brother Alex has had a couple of bad Sports Days, being traumatised in 2 out of 3 years by not winning medals in his races. So why do we do this to our kids? Is it really so helpful to encourage such competition that children are crying because they're so disappointed in not winning races? I really don't think so and I frigging hate Sports Day. Plus there's always one obnoxious git who's kid wins all the races. Not any of my friends if anyone is reading!
To be honest, I was wondering how Sports Day would be carried out at Williams school. The children there have a vast range of physical and intellectual or mental disabilities or conditions, some are in wheelchairs, some are quite sleepy, some with behavioural problems, others strapped into pushchairs as they are wanderers or runners. (I'm not entirely sure what's politically correct when it comes to describing disabilities so apologies for any offence caused!). I was quite excited to see what they would come up with though and looked forwards to William's race, but secretly expected him to do a runner in the wrong direction or just stand there defiant cos he couldn't be bothered. Which, considering the searing heat, would have been my choice too unless they were waving a giant pack of haribos at the finish line.
Every single child was involved in some way in Sports Day, and I was amazed at how the races were designed to be so inclusive. The children in wheelchairs were pushed along by teachers and assistants, the kids beaming as they whizzed past, some children were guided by the adults so they knew what to do, some had to be dragged as they weren't in the mood to co-operate, but all in all, everyone had a great time.
Williams' race was brilliant. It was quite theatrical, and was linked into the topic they were learning in school, which was "Going on Holiday". Each child was to pick up a holiday related item, run with it and pop it in a suitcase some way up the track . William seemed to struggle with waiting for his turn, as I watched him wrestling with a TA, but when it was time to go he really enjoyed toddling off with his sunglasses. He has a really cute dainty run, almost like a little princess tottering in high heels, which is odd considering he kicks like a mule. He didn't quite get the concept of popping them in the case, so the teacher helped. He managed to sneak them out to play with later ;) He does love sunglasses.
Watching all the different children doing their activities made me tearry, not really in a sad way, but because it was such a privilege to see them being included, and the teachers had obviously thought hard about how they were going to execute this. The teachers, TAs, assistant and deputy headteacher, the bus driver(!) were all involved, pushing children along in buggies and chairs, guiding them, encouraging them, clapping, and making it so much fun. There was so much enthusiam and you could really tell that the teachers cared so much for the children and wanted them succeed. It was magical.
There were no medal winners at New Greenhall, just fun. No sense of disappointment for not coming first, no disappointment at dropping the beanbags, no embarrassment because you missed the cue to run, and all the friends and family watching were cheering on every single child there. I sometimes wish Alex's school could take a leaf out of that book. If you ever get chance to attend a Sports Day at a SEN school you'd understand that it really isn't about winning, it's about taking part.
I've always thought that we made the right decision to send William to a special needs school, and this really affirmed that decision. I don't think that a Mainstream school could ever include William the way that New Greenhall has done in the past year that he's been there. For just 3 hours a day since September, William has been transformed. His speech, his interaction, his behaviour, his happiness and our own. It's an amazing place, and its given William the best possible start to school life.
I don't really know if the staff at New Greenhall understand the impact they have on the lives of the children and their families. I hope they do. New Greenhall isn't just a School for children with Special Needs, its FULL of special people, children and adults.
Please have a look at their website, there's some great stuff on there, look out for William and his chums in the Early Learners blog section :)
http://www.newgreenhall.wigan.sch.uk/
Go go go Wottingers! No not that way! Oi! This way! Come on!
Now I've never made his autism secret, but as he gets older and starts to stand out a bit more from his peers, I find that letting people know about it can be a help, and not everyone is there to judge. I've not had many negative response so far (runs to touch wood), but I guess one day I'll meet that arsehole and they'll get ten barrels from that sleep deprived woman on the edge.
Yesterday was William's sports day at New Greenhall school. Now I'm not a fan of Sports Day one iota, I was never physically gifted when I was younger, I was crap at PE and crap at Sports Days, and even now I have the co-ordination of a 3-legged centipede. Williams brother Alex has had a couple of bad Sports Days, being traumatised in 2 out of 3 years by not winning medals in his races. So why do we do this to our kids? Is it really so helpful to encourage such competition that children are crying because they're so disappointed in not winning races? I really don't think so and I frigging hate Sports Day. Plus there's always one obnoxious git who's kid wins all the races. Not any of my friends if anyone is reading!
To be honest, I was wondering how Sports Day would be carried out at Williams school. The children there have a vast range of physical and intellectual or mental disabilities or conditions, some are in wheelchairs, some are quite sleepy, some with behavioural problems, others strapped into pushchairs as they are wanderers or runners. (I'm not entirely sure what's politically correct when it comes to describing disabilities so apologies for any offence caused!). I was quite excited to see what they would come up with though and looked forwards to William's race, but secretly expected him to do a runner in the wrong direction or just stand there defiant cos he couldn't be bothered. Which, considering the searing heat, would have been my choice too unless they were waving a giant pack of haribos at the finish line.
Every single child was involved in some way in Sports Day, and I was amazed at how the races were designed to be so inclusive. The children in wheelchairs were pushed along by teachers and assistants, the kids beaming as they whizzed past, some children were guided by the adults so they knew what to do, some had to be dragged as they weren't in the mood to co-operate, but all in all, everyone had a great time.
Williams' race was brilliant. It was quite theatrical, and was linked into the topic they were learning in school, which was "Going on Holiday". Each child was to pick up a holiday related item, run with it and pop it in a suitcase some way up the track . William seemed to struggle with waiting for his turn, as I watched him wrestling with a TA, but when it was time to go he really enjoyed toddling off with his sunglasses. He has a really cute dainty run, almost like a little princess tottering in high heels, which is odd considering he kicks like a mule. He didn't quite get the concept of popping them in the case, so the teacher helped. He managed to sneak them out to play with later ;) He does love sunglasses.
Watching all the different children doing their activities made me tearry, not really in a sad way, but because it was such a privilege to see them being included, and the teachers had obviously thought hard about how they were going to execute this. The teachers, TAs, assistant and deputy headteacher, the bus driver(!) were all involved, pushing children along in buggies and chairs, guiding them, encouraging them, clapping, and making it so much fun. There was so much enthusiam and you could really tell that the teachers cared so much for the children and wanted them succeed. It was magical.
There were no medal winners at New Greenhall, just fun. No sense of disappointment for not coming first, no disappointment at dropping the beanbags, no embarrassment because you missed the cue to run, and all the friends and family watching were cheering on every single child there. I sometimes wish Alex's school could take a leaf out of that book. If you ever get chance to attend a Sports Day at a SEN school you'd understand that it really isn't about winning, it's about taking part.
I've always thought that we made the right decision to send William to a special needs school, and this really affirmed that decision. I don't think that a Mainstream school could ever include William the way that New Greenhall has done in the past year that he's been there. For just 3 hours a day since September, William has been transformed. His speech, his interaction, his behaviour, his happiness and our own. It's an amazing place, and its given William the best possible start to school life.
I don't really know if the staff at New Greenhall understand the impact they have on the lives of the children and their families. I hope they do. New Greenhall isn't just a School for children with Special Needs, its FULL of special people, children and adults.
Please have a look at their website, there's some great stuff on there, look out for William and his chums in the Early Learners blog section :)
http://www.newgreenhall.wigan.sch.uk/
Go go go Wottingers! No not that way! Oi! This way! Come on!
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