Two years on from Williams diagnosis, and although I'm more at peace with what's going on, I'm not sure I'll ever 'get over it'. There's always gonna be the reminders of what he could have been like when you meet other children his age. Its my problem totally, I just feel a bit sorry for myself every now and again. I'm starting to think that perhaps I'm holding William back a little bit because of my own fears - about what people think of him and us, about people's reaction to his behaviour, the fact that we can't go near public loos, that he can't wait in a queue, that he's still in nappies when he's nearly 5. So, we're gonna start branching out and being a bit more brave. (I might retract that next weekend when he has a paddy in ASDA and starts starfishing on the floor in the biscuit aisle). "Starfish on aisle 4, starfish on aisle 4!"
Now I've never made his autism secret, but as he gets older and starts to stand out a bit more from his peers, I find that letting people know about it can be a help, and not everyone is there to judge. I've not had many negative response so far (runs to touch wood), but I guess one day I'll meet that arsehole and they'll get ten barrels from that sleep deprived woman on the edge.
Yesterday was William's sports day at New Greenhall school. Now I'm not a fan of Sports Day one iota, I was never physically gifted when I was younger, I was crap at PE and crap at Sports Days, and even now I have the co-ordination of a 3-legged centipede. Williams brother Alex has had a couple of bad Sports Days, being traumatised in 2 out of 3 years by not winning medals in his races. So why do we do this to our kids? Is it really so helpful to encourage such competition that children are crying because they're so disappointed in not winning races? I really don't think so and I frigging hate Sports Day. Plus there's always one obnoxious git who's kid wins all the races. Not any of my friends if anyone is reading!
To be honest, I was wondering how Sports Day would be carried out at Williams school. The children there have a vast range of physical and intellectual or mental disabilities or conditions, some are in wheelchairs, some are quite sleepy, some with behavioural problems, others strapped into pushchairs as they are wanderers or runners. (I'm not entirely sure what's politically correct when it comes to describing disabilities so apologies for any offence caused!). I was quite excited to see what they would come up with though and looked forwards to William's race, but secretly expected him to do a runner in the wrong direction or just stand there defiant cos he couldn't be bothered. Which, considering the searing heat, would have been my choice too unless they were waving a giant pack of haribos at the finish line.
Every single child was involved in some way in Sports Day, and I was amazed at how the races were designed to be so inclusive. The children in wheelchairs were pushed along by teachers and assistants, the kids beaming as they whizzed past, some children were guided by the adults so they knew what to do, some had to be dragged as they weren't in the mood to co-operate, but all in all, everyone had a great time.
Williams' race was brilliant. It was quite theatrical, and was linked into the topic they were learning in school, which was "Going on Holiday". Each child was to pick up a holiday related item, run with it and pop it in a suitcase some way up the track . William seemed to struggle with waiting for his turn, as I watched him wrestling with a TA, but when it was time to go he really enjoyed toddling off with his sunglasses. He has a really cute dainty run, almost like a little princess tottering in high heels, which is odd considering he kicks like a mule. He didn't quite get the concept of popping them in the case, so the teacher helped. He managed to sneak them out to play with later ;) He does love sunglasses.
Watching all the different children doing their activities made me tearry, not really in a sad way, but because it was such a privilege to see them being included, and the teachers had obviously thought hard about how they were going to execute this. The teachers, TAs, assistant and deputy headteacher, the bus driver(!) were all involved, pushing children along in buggies and chairs, guiding them, encouraging them, clapping, and making it so much fun. There was so much enthusiam and you could really tell that the teachers cared so much for the children and wanted them succeed. It was magical.
There were no medal winners at New Greenhall, just fun. No sense of disappointment for not coming first, no disappointment at dropping the beanbags, no embarrassment because you missed the cue to run, and all the friends and family watching were cheering on every single child there. I sometimes wish Alex's school could take a leaf out of that book. If you ever get chance to attend a Sports Day at a SEN school you'd understand that it really isn't about winning, it's about taking part.
I've always thought that we made the right decision to send William to a special needs school, and this really affirmed that decision. I don't think that a Mainstream school could ever include William the way that New Greenhall has done in the past year that he's been there. For just 3 hours a day since September, William has been transformed. His speech, his interaction, his behaviour, his happiness and our own. It's an amazing place, and its given William the best possible start to school life.
I don't really know if the staff at New Greenhall understand the impact they have on the lives of the children and their families. I hope they do. New Greenhall isn't just a School for children with Special Needs, its FULL of special people, children and adults.
Please have a look at their website, there's some great stuff on there, look out for William and his chums in the Early Learners blog section :)
http://www.newgreenhall.wigan.sch.uk/
Go go go Wottingers! No not that way! Oi! This way! Come on!
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